I Feel Different From Everyone Else

Sometimes the hardest part of wearing a brace isn't the brace.

It's the feeling that you're the only one.

The only one wearing a brace.

The only one thinking about scoliosis.

The only one dealing with appointments.

The only one carrying this responsibility every day.

You look around at school.

You look around at sports.

You look around at your friends.

And everyone seems normal.

Everyone seems carefree.

Everyone seems to be living life without thinking about things like brace hours and curve progression.

Meanwhile, scoliosis follows you everywhere.

That can make you feel different.

Very different.

And feeling different can be lonely.

Especially during the teenage years.

Most teens want to fit in.

They want to feel normal.

They want to feel like everyone else.

Then something comes along that makes them stand out.

A brace.

A diagnosis.

A visible reminder that their life isn't exactly the same as everyone around them.

That can be hard to accept.

One reason this feeling is so powerful is because being different often feels dangerous.

Not physically dangerous.

Socially dangerous.

You worry people will notice.

You worry people will ask questions.

You worry people will think you're strange.

You worry you'll never fully fit in.

Those fears can become overwhelming.

Especially if you keep them to yourself.

But there is something important to understand.

Feeling different and being alone are not the same thing.

Many teens accidentally combine those ideas.

They think:

"I feel different, therefore I must be alone."

That's not true.

Different does not mean alone.

Different simply means your experience isn't identical to everyone else's.

The reality is that everyone is carrying something.

You just can't always see it.

Some people are dealing with anxiety.

Some people are dealing with depression.

Some people are dealing with family problems.

Some people are dealing with learning challenges.

Some people are dealing with medical conditions nobody knows about.

Every person you meet is carrying something.

The difference is that scoliosis can sometimes feel more visible.

That visibility can make your challenge seem bigger than everyone else's.

But visible and difficult are not the same thing.

Many teens also assume that everyone else feels confident all the time.

That's another illusion.

The classmate you think is confident may be deeply insecure.

The friend you think has everything figured out may be struggling too.

The people who look perfectly comfortable may be fighting battles you know nothing about.

Human beings are very good at hiding struggles.

That's why comparison is so dangerous.

You're comparing your behind-the-scenes experience to everyone else's highlight reel.

And that's never a fair comparison.

Another thing that happens during bracing is that you start noticing every way you're different.

The brace.

The appointments.

The routines.

The responsibilities.

Because you're focused on those differences, they start feeling enormous.

Meanwhile, you stop noticing all the ways you're actually the same as everyone around you.

You still laugh with friends.

You still have favorite shows.

You still have goals.

You still have hobbies.

You still have dreams for your future.

You still have embarrassing moments.

Funny moments.

Exciting moments.

Ordinary moments.

In other words, you're still a teenager.

Scoliosis didn't take that away.

The brace didn't take that away.

The diagnosis didn't take that away.

One of the biggest confidence shifts many teens experience happens when they stop asking:

"How am I different?"

And start asking:

"What do I still have in common with people?"

The answer is usually a lot.

Much more than you realize.

You may have scoliosis.

But scoliosis is not your entire identity.

You are not a diagnosis.

You are not a brace.

You are not a curve measurement.

You are a complete person whose life includes scoliosis.

That's very different.

If you've been feeling different lately, know that you're not alone in that feeling.

In fact, almost every teen with scoliosis has felt it at some point.

The irony is that one of the things making you feel different is actually something you have in common with thousands of other teens.

They've worried about fitting in too.

They've worried about standing out too.

They've worried about being different too.

And many of them eventually discovered something important.

Being different doesn't automatically make you less.

It doesn't make you broken.

It doesn't make you unworthy.

It simply makes you human.

Because every person on this planet is different in some way.

Your difference just happens to be easier for you to see right now.

That doesn't mean it's all that people see when they look at you.

Not even close.