The Waiting Is the Hardest Part

Nobody tells you how much waiting comes with scoliosis.

You hear about curves.

You hear about X-rays.

You hear about appointments.

You hear about treatment options.

But nobody really talks about the waiting.

The waiting between appointments.

The waiting for results.

The waiting for answers.

The waiting to find out what your curve is going to do.

For many teens in monitoring, that waiting becomes one of the hardest parts of the entire journey.

Not because anything bad is happening.

Because nothing is happening.

At least that's what it feels like.

You leave an appointment with questions.

Then you're told to come back in six months.

Six months can feel like a very long time when you're carrying uncertainty.

You want answers now.

You want to know whether your curve will stay the same.

You want to know whether you'll ever need a brace.

You want to know what your next X-ray will show.

Instead, you're asked to wait.

Human beings are not very good at waiting.

Especially when the thing we're waiting for feels important.

Think about the week before a big test.

Or waiting for the results of a competition.

Or waiting to hear news you've been thinking about nonstop.

The waiting often feels worse than the event itself.

That's because when we're waiting, our brains start filling in the blanks.

And unfortunately, worried brains usually don't fill those blanks with positive possibilities.

They fill them with fears.

What if it gets worse?

What if the next appointment goes badly?

What if everything changes?

What if I'm not prepared?

Before long, you're carrying around problems that don't even exist yet.

That's exhausting.

One of the strange things about monitoring is that there isn't always something you can do.

Most of us feel better when we have a task.

Study harder.

Practice more.

Train longer.

Work on the problem.

Monitoring doesn't always give you that option.

Sometimes the plan is simply:

Wait.

Observe.

Live your life.

Come back later.

That can feel frustrating because it doesn't feel active.

But waiting and monitoring are not the same thing.

Monitoring is active.

Your doctors are gathering information.

Tracking growth.

Following patterns.

Making decisions based on evidence.

The waiting part is what you experience between those checkpoints.

And that's where many teens struggle.

The challenge is learning how to live while you wait.

Not after the next appointment.

Not after the next X-ray.

Not after every question has been answered.

Right now.

Because your life is still happening.

School is happening.

Friendships are happening.

Sports are happening.

Birthdays are happening.

Vacations are happening.

Life keeps moving whether your next appointment is next week or six months away.

Sometimes teens accidentally put their lives on hold during monitoring.

They tell themselves:

"I'll relax after my next appointment."

"I'll stop worrying when I get answers."

"I'll feel better when I know what's happening."

The problem is that there is always another appointment eventually.

Another question.

Another unknown.

If you wait for perfect certainty before living your life, you'll spend a lot of time waiting.

One thing that helps is remembering what your job actually is right now.

Your doctor's job is to monitor the curve.

Your job is to live your life.

Those are two different jobs.

You do not need to spend six months doing your doctor's job for them.

You don't need to analyze your spine every day.

You don't need to predict the future.

You don't need to solve problems that don't exist yet.

You simply need to take the next step in front of you.

Today's homework.

Today's practice.

Today's plans.

Today's life.

Another thing worth remembering is that waiting feels longest at the beginning.

Everything is new.

Everything feels uncertain.

Everything feels important.

Over time, many teens become more comfortable with the process.

Not because they love waiting.

Nobody loves waiting.

But because they learn that life continues between appointments.

They learn that uncertainty doesn't have to control every day.

They learn that they can be okay even when some questions remain unanswered.

That's a powerful lesson.

Not just for scoliosis.

For life.

Because life is full of waiting.

Waiting for opportunities.

Waiting for answers.

Waiting for things we cannot control.

Learning how to live during those periods is one of the most valuable skills you'll ever develop.

So if the waiting feels hard right now, that's okay.

You're not doing anything wrong.

You're experiencing something almost every teen in monitoring experiences.

The questions.

The uncertainty.

The countdown to the next appointment.

It's all normal.

Just don't forget something important:

While you're waiting for answers, your life is still happening.

Don't miss it.

Because one day you'll realize that some of your best memories happened during the waiting.

And you'll be glad you didn't put your life on hold while the future figured itself out.